Just wanted to record my trip to Thiruvannamalai yesterday. Though been there thrice, this was very special to me. Here it goes.
Woke-up Saturday early by 11.00am, glancing through Dinakaran and noticed a small news about Uttharayana celebrations at Tiruvannamalai. I dont know much about the Uttharayana period except that its related to the sun's travel path [courtesy SJV] and considered auspicious. Bhisma (Mahabharatha) in his arrow-bed was holding his last breath to die in this Uttharayana period.
Back to blog :).. A week before, I was thinking of making this trip, but skipped it at the eleventh hour due to my laziness. But this time, I dont want to give space for any thoughts to delay the trip, hence started by 12 sharp. Adhoc trips are always interesting. No planning, worries, responsibilities, dependencies, comfortability anything. You and you alone, with just one goal. Fulfill your desire. Even if you die half-the-way, its worth it. Just FYI'ed my family that I will not be back till tomorrow afternoon (initially thought of having a night-out in temple, but it didnt work-out :)), I just pushed off.
After a good four and half hours trip, reached the Adobe of fire by 5.00pm, I was very eager to see the deity, since I haven't seen him so-far even though I have been there few times before. All previous trips were all on a full moon day and hence couldn't get a chance to enter in the temple.
Though yesterday was not a full-moon day, lot of Melmaruvathur red sarees were occupying the temple. Most of them were speaking Telugu and I was really wondering how could these ladies manage to plan and make such long trips, that too in red. In the next 1 hour, by 6pm, I had a good darshan of Annamalaiaar and Unnamulaiamman. I was kind of expecting a big lingam, but the lingam was not that big, and the unnamulaiamman diety was even small compared to her better-half. Not even the size of Kanchi Kamakshi diety. Anyhow, size has nothing to do with the grace they spread. After the darshan, I felt a good relief that one of my long pending item got completed. Four out of five pancha-bootha sthalas are now covered. Next is you - Thiruvaanaikka :)..
One thing very specific to mention in this post is this - The Baadhala Lingam inside the temple. This is the place where Ramana Maharishi in his 14th age sat down for a Thapas. He was not meditating there for one or two days. It was for full 14 years he was sitting there doing his self-enquiry, and during this time his body was torn by rodents and termites inside the place. We need to walk down some ten steps to enter the cave. Below is a small place where he performed his thapas. Now they have consecrated a lingam there and have kept Ramana Maharishi's photo. Outside the place, people are allowed to meditate and few foreigners were meditating in peace.
Believe me or not, the Baadhala lingam place is quite vibrant. I never have felt such vibrations anywhere. I almost started trembling even when I was just walking down the steps. Standing before the lingam, my pulse really got shooted up like anything. Not sure why, but just a mere thought that one man really sat there, performed a thapas for 14 long years and came out as Maharishi, is just not a story. It really happened and Iam standing few steps near that very place. Only in stories I have read about great Rishis performing thapas and rituals, but no one can point an exact place where they performed such intense rituals. Even Thirumoolar was said to be performing thapas for 3000 years in Chidambaram temple, but is that true and where? One can point to the forest or mountain where such souls performed thapas, but not to the exact place. Buddha Gaya could be one such place, but then it happened some 2500 years back.
To be very frank, Iam not a theist or atheist; just an ordinary agnostic trying to find some solid proof to stick on either side. But witnessing such places is really making me re-think, is there definitely something beyond this physical dimension to achieve? If the answer is a very very solid "YES", then? (I really dont know how to complete this "then".. just keeping it abstract)
Hell a lot of questions popped-up - Is the 14 year old boy a fool to sit there in a dark cave for 14 years just wasting his life? How did his physical body allow him to do so? At the end of his thapas, he didnt use any of his powers to earn money. His only asset could be the small piece of cloth he was wearing around his waist, and that too could be for this society. Then what did he really achieve? Just crossing the tides of this mind and going mindless? What could he attain there than a dead-peace? Is that the final destination of every human? If so, why are we not seeded with such strong thought to move towards this destination? Is that the so-called Maaya acting upon? Is that our life-times old karma's preventing us to realize this? Who is really playing with us? Is this body something like an Alien shown in Men-In-Black movie? Some strange invisible thing sitting inside us and controlling us.. find the source and the game ends... lot of such silly questions.. but no answers..
Started my girivalam around 6. This time no crowd and noise. Cool breeze all around and with sound of mountain. Few Saadhu's walking here and there. Couple of rich families performing Girivalam in their scorpio. Overall, it was very peaceful to walk. At times, the thought of - "Its just me and the mountain.. All alone" was really keeping me energetic. Thanks to Rajinikanth for lighting the girivalam path, otherwise the walk would have been a bit scary as well. After a 3 hours walk, I reached where I started. Temple was still open that time - 9.30pm or so. I was kind of thinking to enter the temple again, but I then reserved the thought of seeing him one more time for the next-time.
